What’s that Giant Sucking Sound?

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Why, it’s the Jim Rex plan for South Carolina schools.

After all his hemming and hawing, hootin’ and hollerin’ about how he was the man to fix South Carolina’s pathetically bad public schools (fewer than 25% of 8th graders can add and subtract proficiently!), what has Jim Rex decided to do? Proving that he refuses to merely pussyfoot around the state’s biggest problem, Jim Rex isn’t just starting a committee: He’s appointing five committees.

Depending on which part of the state you hail from (or whether you can afford private schools), this announcement will provoke either howls of laughter or a deluge of tears. Whether this is History repeating itself as Tragedy or as Farce is up to you to decide but in the spirit of Rex’s five committees—which are destined to fail our state as miserably as the public schools have failed the children of, say, Jasper County—I give you five wise old sayings about the nature of committees:

  • A committee is a thing which takes a week to do what one good man can do in an hour.
  • A committee is a cul-de-sac down which ideas are lured and then quietly strangled.
  • A camel is a horse designed by committee
  • If you want to kill time, a committee meeting is the perfect weapon
  • A committee is a group of men who individually can do nothing but as a group decide that nothing can be done

Our children are suffering in substandard schools and Emperor Nero Jim Rex is assigning people to committees. Thanks a lot, Dr. Rex.

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